New Yorker Cartoon

Sniffle, I'm illin. This all go lifestyle is catching up to me a bit. I'm sorry I haven't posted in so long. Things have been nuts! I started my internship and it's amazing! It's so much work, I've never worked so hard in my life(especially for no money). But I'm learning so much. I was worried that I wouldn't be good enough and I wasn't sure how to show them how much I want this job or that I'm good at what I do. But I'm getting the hang of it and I'm doing well and working harder than I could have imagined.

Things are also going well at the venue, really well in fact. I'm working multiple front of the house positions as well as doing office work. The managers seem to really like me and frequently refer to my great work ethic. It's not the norm for employees to work multiple positions so what they're doing for me is a unique and important opportunity and one they clearly were in need of. I know I'm doing well there and even though it's just a bar job for now it has the potential to really help me out in the future. It's also nice because I'm meeting so many great and interesting people there.

As far as dating, I'm actually doing it. I've been dating my ex the comedian for about a month now. He's actually moving to LA in a week, so we will be breaking up. But for this month it's been good, and simple. It's basically dating with training wheels, which I think I needed. I've been through a lot emotionally in the past few years and I needed something easy to remind me that things can be good.

New York is also coming back to life. My little park is all in bloom and filled with kids and dogs and ice cream trucks. My friends and I are planning picnics and trips and my allergies are back for the season. I'm thrilled to be in NYC for the summer again, it's my favourite time. Even though it's brutally hot and smelly, it's beyond fun. The city comes alive and it's as if everyones come out of hibernation. I always think of the Death Cab for Cutie song Summer Skin. It really is as if everyone emerges in new skin, glowing and ready to recharge in the sun like little solar panels. All the pain and hardship of winter is instantly forgotten and we greet the new season like sailors seeing land. Summer in New York is my favourite and I'm thrilled to be spending another one here.

One Of These Things First

First Day by acelovesvintage featuring retro shades

What I WISH I was wearing to my first day at my internship. Sadly, this outfit is about a million times out of my budget. But a girl can dream. Tonight I'm getting my haircut as well, so it's a big day! Wish me luck!

Kick Drum Heart

The good times keep rolling in. I just found out yesterday that I got my internship!! And they want me to start immediately! I will be starting as soon as Friday. I also start training at my bar job tonight. It is actually pretty intense, I have to train for three shifts then take a test! Things are about to get crazy busy but I have a feeling it's going to be great. I've been trying for years to get this internship and I've finally got it, now I've just got to bust my ass for the next few months and really shine at these jobs(which means I'll be buying one of these). But I'm super excited, this is the stuff I've been trying to get into and now I've got the chance to do it.

I'm also saving my pennies to go to The Newport Folk Festival(if you haven't checked it out by now you should, immediately!). Though I'm hoping my parents will shell out as a congratulations present, dare to dream. I'm planning to go with a bunch of friends, some from here, some from Boston, it should be great! I know that the ExBossFriend will be there, and that I'll be dealing with him a lot in the coming months with these two jobs, but right now I just don't care all that much.

On the topic of dating, meh. It's not happening all that much. I've been spending a decent amount of time with my Comedian Ex. Mostly I think because he's moving in a month and that's dating with an expiration date. Oddly enough that works for me right now. I'm not over ExBossFriend and not quite ready to jump back in there so for now I'm ok with dating with training wheels.

I've Been Told I'm Rather Cat Like

Cause Lord knows I land on my feet and I'm beginning to think I may even have 9 lives. Sunday afternoon I randomly sent out my resume to all the local venues. None of them were advertising, but I figured why not? About an hour later I got a text saying "Hey Ace, call me tomorrow so we can set up a time to meet, So and So From Cool Venue". Weird, non? But awesome. A few hours after that I got a text from my old boss informing me he had just said nice things about me to the owners of said cool venue. Hurray again!

The next day I gave them a ring and the owner told me to come in around 4, which I did. I waited a bit then met with the owner who basically asked me to tell him about myself. Which I did. I explained that I'm a recent graduate, with the golden ticket of a music degree, I told him about the internship I had interviewed for and my need to support my habit of volunteering in my feild and that working at a venue seemed like the most logical way to do that. So he says to me "see here's the thing, we're not hiring" and of course my heart sinks. "But," he says "I saw your resume and it's great and your old boss said such great things about you and the fact is I have a really good feeling about you and I want you here". WHAT??!!

So he says to me that he can't promise I'll be in the production and booking side of things right away or all the time but that he wants me to get to know everything. I'm going to start off at the desk and hostessing, then learn to serve, then bartend, learn stage set up, production, booking and marketing. Basically, he wants me to know everything. He had assumed I was looking for a music job, I was just looking to pour beers! So they are going to give me a call in a few days to start figuring out where to put me and get me trained. Holy bananas! Now if I get this internship as well I get to be on both sides of things seeing how it works from the inside out! At long last, my first paid semi music job!

A few months ago I went back to Boston for the first time and saw an old professor of mine. While explaining the oddessy that finding a music job has been for me he says to me "I don't worry about you, you've got rubber soles, you always land on your feet". I'm this close to things really working out and I'm hoping like hell that it all falls into place. Wish me luck!

On a side note, I'll be out of town and incommunicado for a few days since I'll be home in the backwoods for my birthday with my family. Upon my return I shift gears into the hyper drive that the next few months of my life will hopefully be. Promise to write again soon!

Interviews, Interviews, Interviews

Well, I had my interview. And I actually think it went pretty darn well. The guy who interviewed me was only a few years older than me and was really cool. We knew a lot of the same people, I've worked with a lot of the bands on their roster and we vibed well. I'm hopeful, dear God I'm hoping. I still haven't found employment to support this pipe dream I call a career in music but I'm trying. I don't think I got the bar job at the bar my friend works at, but I'm still trying. This whole being unemplyed thing is kicking my ass but at the same time I've always done my best when I'm up against the wall and I'm just trying to hold onto faith that I will claw my way out of this.

In other news, dating. It's not really happening. Like I said I ended thing with my musician ex boss/ex boyfriend. Friday was my birthday and I didn't hear from him at all, which was pretty much the last nail in the coffin. The french guy I was dating two years ago is still in my life, though at this point only as a friend and he's taking me out tonight for my birthday. I know he still loves me, but at this point in my life I'm just not ready to have anyone else be a part of it. So for now I'm hanging out with my girlfriends and kicking the job markets ass and that's just going to have to be enough for now.

Have you guys ever lost your job or felt a bit out of place? New York City is pretty much kicking my ass up and down the street right now but I still love her. How do you guys get through tough times?

The Good, The Bad, The City

I'm back. And good lord a lot has changed...Let's get started.

First I live in Brooklyn. I moved randomly on a Tuesday, on whim, and I've stayed for the past 7 months. I crashed at the old Halsey house for the first month. It has since been condemned. I got a job managing a salon and I grew to hate it, then I got fired. Now I'm unemployed and I've got an interview at my dream company on Friday, which also happens to be my birthday. I've got a little apartment, it's painted turquoise, it's on a park, in the ghetto. I've got an amazing group of girlfriends, we're all musicians, and artists, and broke. I was dating a nice boy, he was not a boy since he was 10 years older than me, but he is moving to Boston, and I'm not dating him anymore. I was dating a not so nice boy, the same not so nice boy musician I was dating in Boston. He moved here, he did not move for me, we are not dating any longer. I am in love with New York and it is kicking my ass. I'm broke, I'm tired, I'm lost and completely head over heels with my city. It's about time I started blogging about it.

I Have Been an Absent Blogger

I'm sorry I haven't written guys. It's tough to keep motivated these days. I didn't get the job at Sony, as a result I did get to go to North Carolina's Outer Banks for a week with my best lady friend in the whole wide world. But I cannot lie, I really would have liked a job. I've been back from vaca for a little over a week and it seems there is another bump in my road. My temp job in the office where my dad works has evaporated. My boss, it seems, is on permanent vacation and therefore has left me with nothing to work on. So long income! So I spend my days sending out hundreds of resumes. Making mass quantities of follow up calls and going on daily crying jags.

Truth is, I'm lonely as hell out here. I don't know a soul in Ithaca and all my parents friends(and my parents) seem to ask about is my job hunt. The sad fact is, there's nothing to tell. I'm like the little engine who could, but I'm runnin' outta steam! I'm frustrated and I'm feeling pretty useless. I'm not even getting call backs. So sometimes I take the dogs hiking in the gully and I can escape for a little while. But I can't escape the ever growing isolation I feel. It's pretty much me and my TV. However, I can safely say I recommend Heroes the TV show, I can say this cause I've watched every single episode of all four seasons. Don't say I never achieved anything.

I am still dating that boy, I'm not where it's going, mostly cause I'm not sure where I'm going. But I like him, and it would be nice to have him be my in city gentleman friend rather than my travel to get smoochies friend. I've also got a wedding to go to this weekend with a friend of mine from NYC who's coming up to stay with me. I'm actually really looking forward to this, he's my french speaking ex but also one of my closest friends and I know that he gets where I'm coming from. Plus, it's an indian wedding, in other words, bright colors, lots of dancing and celebration. I think it's exactly what I need.

Fireworks

My annual fourth of july post. I don't know about you but I like to dress the part for the 4th. I bust out my red, white and blue and go for it. In honor of that I've found some red, white and blue for you as well. Hope you like it!
high waisted jeans or shorts would be great with this for a casual look. You could also pair it with a sweet skirt or even wear it over a bikini for a 4th of july beach party.
how great are these? They're so classic and of course you can wear them all summer, not just the fourth.
Oh I love it, how sweet! It's fitted and charming and just a bit silly.

It looks like I'll be heading to NYC for the fourth. I've got a few parties to attend and some good friends to run into. My social life is more or less exclusively in NYC at this point, I've got the contents of my apartment ready to go and frankly, I'm ready to hit the road. All I need now is a job to come through and I should know sometime around Tuesday. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Once a King or Queen of Halsey Always a King or Queen of Halsey

^The ceiling in my old roommate at Halsey's room.

Ah new york, new york. It was so good to be back. You want the recap? Ok, I'll try and keep it short...

So I arrived in NYC with the help of my mom's best friend who is a real-estate agent in Tribeca. We got into the upper west side and I hopped a subway bound for my beloved Brooklyn. I arrived and was met by my ex roommate/pseudo ex beau. The one I mentioned who I dated for awhile after B and I broke up. We're not dating anymore but we're still good friends and whenever I'm in NYC I still crash at Halsey Kingdom. I met him at our two friends adorable little ground floor brownstone and we had a few beers and some mexican candy in their charming little backyard. It made me terribly jealous, it is exactly the kind of apartment I want. It was also so much fun.

Now, the next part of my evening requires a little explanation. For the sake of full disclosure I'm going to be straight up with you. I did the unthinkable. Ok, so here's the thing, several of my good friends admitted to doing it too and so I got curious. I figured, what's the harm, I'll just give it a try, have a look around. But then, I was hooked. That's right, I tried online dating. So, I had yet to actually get up the nerve to embark on any actual dates but there was this one guy I'd been talking to. We'd exchanged a few messages, he'd called and we'd talked for an hour(yeh, like in middle school), and he seemed sweet and non ax murderer-y. So I said to myself, Self, why not, let's give it a try. So I packed my metaphorical pepper spray, casually informed my best friend and then hung up on her before she could lecture me, put on my pretty blue maxi dress and headed out to the west side.

I met him at a cute, darkly lit little bar, we found ourselves a quietish corner and a few glasses of wine. To my complete shock and awe it was neither awkward nor blood bath horrible craigslist killer like. It was actually, kind of, fun. And the fun kept coming, we talked, we laughed, we headed to a new quieter and only slightly brighter bar which afforded the luxury of a couch. Bars with couches get serious points in my book. We had a few more beers, psychoanalyzed each other(what, what do you do on your dates?) and then all the sudden he looked at me and said come home with me. Yeh, I know, alarm bells should have gone off. But instead I found myself getting in a cab bound for the upper west side(my what a circular day) and then I found myself getting falafel(yum). And then I found myself making jokes in an upper west side studio with a boy who was playing guitar.

As it turns out dating, while scary, can also be really really fun. I don't know if this will go anywhere, maybe, but either way it was a really great date with a really sweet guy. He has since called(side note: we're also getting married and coming up with names that fulfill both our irish and indian heritage...kidding) and I will hopefully be seeing him again. However, the next day and therefore the next post was the interview, dun dun dun...

Bushwick Blues

I leave on Wednesday for NYC again for interview round two. The nerves are already setting in, anybody got a Valium? I've got no clue what to wear, I don't know when I'm heading there or for that matter where I'm staying(details, details). The website for the studio I'm interviewing at is under construction, of course. I know I'm a good interviewer, I know I know what I'm doing, but this is my only shot so far, it makes me nervous. Ahhhhhh.

This weekend I went back to my hometown for my two best friend's little sister's graduation party. I got to see a bunch of old friends which was so great but lord did it make me lonely at even the thought of coming back to Ithaca. The other thing that made me surprisingly lonely was the fact that I was THE ONLY single person there. Ouch, self esteem and pride. My one friend is engaged and rolling up on the one year till her wedding. My other friend, granted after many failed attempts, has a very sweet new boyfriend. Her older sister is still dating her boyfriend from high school, wtf? One of my guy friends has been with his girlfriend for years and there I am, single, and ready to mingle? With who? I suddenly found myself craving that companionship, that team feeling, that partner. And I had nada, though my glass of wine did it's best to be supportive by remaining at all times full.

Usually I'm pretty ok with being single, fancy free or whatever. I like to flirt, I like to go out, I'm rabidly protective of my freedom of choice and independence. But recently(and this is in part because I am sequestered hermit like in Ithaca) I am feeling lonely, I am feeling incomplete. And while I try to keep my chin up, shoulders back, head high, shoes tied, I get down and I want somebody there to kiss me and say it's ok. For now I'm focusing on the job thing, my inner mantra is a continuous run-on of job, apartment, dog, job, apartment, dog. There is no boy in that equation, boys can come after that. But it doesn't mean I'm not feeling a touch lonely.

Now because I'm pretty sure he has a bell in his house that rings every time I either swear I'm done with him or am feeling particularly down on myself, my ex boss texted me. I hardly ever hear from him, we were one of those never began and never ended scenarios. I really liked him and I've got no clue how he ever felt about me other than he would never give in but would never walk away. I'll admit, he's kind of a mess, he's a musician who's rarely around, he's too often self centered and vain but he has moments, and bare with me while I justify all that no good lover man mess away, he has moments where he is sweet and he lets his guard down and I'm hooked. I'm like a big dumb puppy, I growl and I snarl and I keep my back to the wall but then he's nice and I roll over and give in.

So now my best friend and I had already planned to go to NYC for 4th of July weekend and were going to see a show of the band that he happened to sign to the label I used to work out. Well, turns out he'll be there, all sweet talk and whiskey and I'll do my dog and pony show with a rousing refrain of "I don't care" and then I'll give in and hopefully my best friend will drag me away and chain me in a basement far far away from the temptation of my cell phone and a bottle of Jameson. I know I know, I make it sound awful like a bad indie movie but it's not bad really. He inspires me to do more with my music, and he's a good friend and I'm comfortable with him. The problem of course is that he won't just give in, isn't that always the problem though?

What I'm Listening To:

Bushwick Blues- Delta Spirit

The Job Hunt: An Employment Warrior

Here's the thing, I'm a smart girl and I know how to play my cards. And right now I'm approaching job hunting like a battle field. You've got to have a strategy. You can't just go out guns blazing, showing 'em all you got. You've got to play your cards right. I started off applying, contacting some old employers, but it was leisurely, casual, I hadn't begun my full blown stalking yet, I was assessing the enemy, I sent in spies, I tapped their phones and sent out a few exploratory submarines. Then I upped the anty, I started using(at a friends suggestion) a Brooklyn address on my resume, this was when I sent out the first wave of troops, guerrilla fighters disguised as killer resumes. The result, a few more replies in general but nothing from the fortress that is the music industry. Next I informed them of my immediate availability to interview and subsequently start working, I dropped the parachutes in, I armed the missiles but wasn't quite pushing the button. Hey, I'll sleep on the street if I can get a job. Job first, we'll figure out the rest later. Then I started calling, sweet talking receptionists, some of whom weren't so sweet, my spies were among their soldiers but they were still in the bottom ranks. Still, my enemy did not concede. I've still got a few tricks up my sleeve but my artillery is running low, my spies have switched sides, my tanks have a flat and my submarines are in Bermuda. It's starting to look like I'm going to have to just throw it out there, give it all I've got, Braveheart style running onto the field painted blue and outnumbered, I just might have to push that button. So this is me, kilt clad and out for blood, I'm pulling out all the stops, calling in the reserves, getting off my horse and going in bare knuckled. In short, the music industry had better prepare, cause I'm backed into a corner and I'm going to fight my way out.